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Team
pairings bring
Scatman to his knees
Score balloons to 80
under weight of punitive partner pairings
As if playing under fear of dismemberment
wasn't enough, Saturday's "accidental" last-minute GolfPrick pairings
brought Scatman's game to its knees, ending his string of sub and
near-par scoring and salvaging his GolfPrick organization membership, at
least for the time-being.
Scatman seemed to collapsed under the weight of
his Saturday partners, which was an on-the-tee last-minute change
consisting of the Professor, Ralph Squirrels, Haydie, and Nina, who shot
80, 85, 94, and 97, disrespectively.
"We have ways of making sure that members
who take advantage of us are brought back down to our level,"
said one dark-haired GolfPrick, who requested anonymity, sings at
funerals, and cleverly orchestrated the last-minute team structures.
"The kind of punishment meted out on Saturday should teach him a lesson.
Although the "large one" was out of town, his spirit was certainly
present and I think he'd be proud of how we handled this disciplinary
action in his absence."
"It was just too heavy a burden for me to
carry," Scatman said of his team, who at one point were 14 bets down in
the three-ball team competition. "One of my partners, who I will
not throw under the bus, lived up to his nickname by hitting nine balls
out of bounds. I think my team hit five balls in the water on the
par 3 #17. I needed to get my handicap back on track anyway and I
didn't want to further risk getting kicked out of such a fine upstanding
organization," he added. "Fortunately, the other team wasn't
worth a crap either and we didn't lose too much even after playing so
bad, collectively. But, I got the message."
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